Casual Dating In Australia: Benefits And Downsides
You might be considering getting into casual dating. What does casual dating actually mean and how do you know if it’s for you?
Many people are looking for relationships that are fun, exciting, sexy, and drama free.
When two people begin dating casually, they typically will have a strong physical relationship, as in have sex quite often, but there is no real commitment between the two of them.
Both are free to see other people unless spoken about and agreed otherwise.
What Is Casual Dating?
You may have heard the term ‘casual dating’ thrown around over the past few years and really wondered what it means.
You are probably very familiar with a traditional relationship, one where two partners are committed to each other, but a casual relationship is a bit different than this.
When you are in a casual relationship with someone, it is non-committal.
In other words, you are free to see other people, but will still, in some ways, still be connected to the person you are seeing casually.
For instance, most of the time, in a casual relationship, you will have sex with that person, you might go grab a meal together, or you might be good friends.
However, you can never be committed in a casual relationship. Confused? Read on to learn more:
Examining a Casual Dating Relationship
In order to understand what a casual dating relationship is, it might be best to learn what a casual relationship isn’t.
When you are in a casual relationship with someone, you will not be dating them in a traditional sense.
For instance, if someone is your boyfriend or girlfriend, you might meet up with friends, you might go out for a fancy meal, or you may actually go on a date.
In the case of a casual dating relationship, these things probably won’t happen, and if they do, it would be pretty rare.
You will also realise that a casual dating relationship means that you won’t be in a committed relationship with this person.
For many people, this is an ideal situation as it will give you the freedom to see others and you won’t be ‘stuck’ with one person. Others, however, might prefer something a bit more permanent.
To Commit Or Not To Commit?
It will really come down to the people in the casual relationship to decide what type of commitment, if any, they will have to each other.
Most of the time, the most commitment you will have is only a friendship and many people in a casual relationship will likely have a few people they see on a fairly regular basis.
Additionally, you will find that the most important part of a casual relationship is sex. These relationships are very different from traditional relationships because of this.
Though you will certainly have sex in a traditional relationship, the relationship isn’t based on sex. In a casual dating relationship, however, it will be.
Is Casual Dating a Pre-Cursor to a Real Relationship?
In a real casual dating relationship, you might want to look at it as a relationship that is a try-out, or audition, for a real relationship.
Many casual relationships just won’t work, and that’s ok.
There are some that do, and the partners will move on to a committed relationship. The nice thing about a casual relationship is that it can go any way you want, as long as both partners are in some type of agreement.
Though many people imagine college students and young adults engaging in this type of relationship, in truth, many people in their thirties, forties or even older are now seeing the benefits of this arrangement. The reason?
Because they can get their physical and emotional needs met without the drama that comes from a committed relationship and for many, that is exactly what they are looking for.
Is a casual dating relationship right for you?
How to Have Casual Dating Nothing Serious
Casual dating is a type of relationship that has zero commitment, no strings attached sex as its focus.
When casual dating, you might have one or more people that you meet with periodically and just have sex with them.
There is nothing more involved. Is this something you might be interested in?
If yes, here are some things that you should know about casual dating:
The Benefits of Casual Dating
Before you get too deep into casual dating, you should know that there are certainly some benefits to this relationship type.
For example, you will get sex! Who wouldn’t want to be in a relationship where you get regular sex?
Next, since there is no commitment here, you don’t need to feel like you are cheating or hiding anything if you sleep with someone else.
You also can protect your emotions when in this type of relationship as it is casual with no emotional attachment.
The Keys to Success with Casual Dating
Now that you know about this type of relationship, as well as the benefits, you probably are ready to get started, right?
Before you jump on the internet and look for someone to hook up with, you will first want to look at how you can succeed with this type of relationship.
First, you want to make sure that a casual relationship is really right for you.
These relationships can be outstanding, if that’s what you want…but if you are not being honest with yourself and you fall in love with your casual sex partner after the first time, there is an issue.
There is no room in a casual relationship for feelings or emotions, so if this is a possibility for you, you might want to try something else.
You will also want to make sure that you are keeping the lines of communication open in a casual relationship.
You should easily be able to talk openly about sex, you should be able to tell your partner what you want and you shouldn’t judge what they might want from you.
This doesn’t mean you have to do it, necessarily, but you should definitely not judge them for it. This is a time for fun and a time to try new things.
Casual Dating Rules Of Your Arrangement?
Also, at the beginning of this arrangement, it is wise to lay out the rules.
For instance, will you tell anyone about this? If you are, who? Are there any restrictions on meetings? Are there times you cannot meet?
How are you going to set up meetings? How often? When you can iron all of that out, you can lay the foundation for a great casual relationship.
Up Your Sex Skills
Finally, make sure that you are improving your sex skills and also seeking other people. When it comes to your skills in bed, do some research and see how you can improve.
Your casual sex partner can even help you with this…so can anyone else you may be seeing.
You see, the best way to ensure this is a successful relationship is to be sure that you are not getting emotionally attached and they best way to do this is to have more than one partner.
Is Casual Dating Right For Me?
Before getting into it to see if dating someone casually is right for you, it can be interesting to look at the general view of casual dating.
As long as two people have an understanding from the beginning of the relationship about what their expectations are, there is no reason that casual dating cannot work.
It is important, however, that both partners are on the same page, both partners understand that this is a commitment free relationship, and both partners follow the rules.
If all of that is considered, it is certainly possible that casual dating can be a great thing. The question is, is casual dating a good idea for you?
What Type of Relationship Do You Want?
In order to determine if casual dating might be right for you, it will be important to think about what type of relationship you want for yourself.
Depending on the type of person you are and where you are in your life, you might not be looking for something serious.
If this is the case, a casual relationship might be perfect for you.
However, if you think that it is time to think about settling down, you might not want to get into a casual relationship at this point, as you might be setting yourself up for disappointment.
Remember, in a casual relationship, there is no commitment.
Do You Ever Get Jealous or Clingy?
Another thing that can help you determine if getting into a casual relationship is right for you is to look at yourself in an honest way.
Do you ever find yourself becoming jealous of your friends, family, siblings, or significant others? Have you ever been told you are too clingy?
If so, you may want to really think about if this is something you will be able to deal with. Since there is no commitment, both partners in a casual relationship are able to see other people.
Ask yourself if it’s OK for your partner to see other people or not.
Do You Like Sex?
You should also take into account the sex part of this type of relationship.
Sex is usually the central focus of a casual relationship, so if you like sex, and want more sex, you will probably think that this type of relationship is great.
In fact, many people get into these relationships simply to explore their sexuality, to try new things, and to gain more experience with sex.
Are You OK With a Lack of Emotion?
Finally, you will need to determine if you are OK if the person you are sleeping with doesn’t have feelings for you ‘in that way’.
In other words, because casual relationships put so much focus on the physical part of a relationship, there is not much emotion involved.
Many people are certainly fine with this, others, however, are not. If you aren’t sure you would like that very much, a casual dating relationship might not be right.
As you can see, a casual dating relationship can be perfect for many people, but not for all. The big question, that only you can answer is this: is casual dating a good idea for you?
Casual Dating to a Serious Relationship – How it’s Done
There are many people out there who have found themselves involved in some type of casual dating situation, perhaps even you.
Some of these people, however, want to move out of that realm of casual dates and move into something that means a bit more, like a committed relationship.
Now, you might be wondering if this is even a possibility since many times, when you are dating casually, you don’t really find people who are looking for something more serious.
Yet, it is certainly possible.
So, if you are currently in a casual relationship and think you might want to take it to the next level, here are some things you need to know:
Evaluate Your Own Feelings from the Start
If you are considering attempting to take your casual relationship to the next level, you need to be sure that this is what you want before you make a move. Why?
Because it will likely be a game changer one way or the other.
On one hand, you will tell your casual partner that you would like to take the relationship to a more serious, committed level and he or she might break it off because they don’t want the same thing.
On the other hand, you might make this announcement and they will be totally into it and want the same thing. Because of these extremes, you need to be absolutely sure where your feelings stand.
The Sooner the Better
As soon as you have done this, you want to make your move. It is very important that you take some time to talk to your casual dating partner as soon as you realise that your feelings are more than they should be.
The longer you wait, the harder it will be if your feelings are not reciprocated. On top of that, if you are ready for something more serious, you will definitely not want to stay with someone who doesn’t want the same.
Take Your Time
If your casual partner is also into trying out something more serious, you will want to be sure that you take your time and allow the serious part of your new relationship happen gradually.
In other words, there is no need to start sharing your relationship status with friends and family, planning your wedding or talking about how many kids you want to have. Instead, take it slow, let this new relationship settle in and let it develop naturally.
Start Really Dating Each Other
For some couples who are exploring this newfound relationship status, it can be very helpful to go back to basics. What does this mean exactly?
It means, see each other once or twice a week, actually go on dates, such as out to dinner or to grab a drink, and put sex off for a week or two.
Instead of having sex, take the time to talk and really get to know each other.
This will allow the two of you to connect more on an emotional level, since you have already connected on the physical one.
It is important to remember, though these relationships can certainly change into something serious and even eventually last a lifetime, that there is also the possibility that they won’t amount to anything.
After all, both of you probably got into this type of relationship because you didn’t want anything serious or because you didn’t want the drama of a commitment.
If you are starting to develop feelings for your casual partner, or think you want something more, it is very important to make the move and share this information with them.
Things will only get worse, if you don’t.